In the end.....

Finally, on one Thursday that I did not have a squash game, I brought her out for dinner.

Now this happened after all the excitement from the previous posts. So i decided to test her.

She gets into the car.

"Hi. How are you today? Where would you like to eat?"

"Hi. The day was ok. You decide."

"No. Tonight you decide. Everytime I have been deciding, I think this one night you decide."

"Is there something wrong? Why are you like that? Tell me what is it that you are not happy with?"

"I am ok. I am just asking you to decide."

"No, from the tone of your voice you are not happy. If you were not happy why did you ask me out to eat? When you ask me out to eat, it should be a happy mood. Why you ask me out to eat when you are not in a good mood? You tell me what is troubling you now."

"I tell you, lets go out and have dinner and I will let you know what is troubling me."

"No, I want to know what is troubling you now. Otherwise you can just drop me home."

With that, I took the turn and decided to drive her home. I told her en route that I do not think we could be together.

Of course she was not happy. She said that she had rejected two others already and how would they feel. One was earning RM13000/month and another was a surgeon. She did not like to hurt people. I wonder if she realized how much I went through in the 4 months with her.

So was it money? No, she says. It was not money. She never asked me to take her shopping, never asked to buy this buy that. But then I pointed to her, you ask me quite a lot about money.

She says, "I was just testing you, to see your answers. I am not that type of girl."

"Well, then why do you ask it and talk about it so frequently?"

"Why do you only listen? Why do you not see my actions? Actions speak louder than words. I have never asked you to take me out shopping or buy me expensive stuff."

So, eventually it is my fault for taking her to eat good food that she can only survive on, no others and they costs an expense. And then i will need to understand that actions speaks louder than words so therefore say what you mean & mean what you say means nothing at all.

I drive round her block about 20 times, because it was 10km later that I drop her. She was, of course, unhappy. But then I felt worse because I had to tell her that I did not think the relationship could work out.

She did not understand how I could be so cruel, but in me I felt that had I let this go on, it would have been suffering, perhaps for both of us. In that respect, I thought it better to end it and stay friends rather than moving forward dating and going to the next level.

Yup, it was an experience to learn from. Perhaps I had pampered her too much, gave her the comfortability that there was someone for her while she did not commit herself and also a guy too patient and refusing to argue. I guess all this added up to a wrong impression from her side and a wrong impression from my side eventually leading to a cannot work situation.

Anyhow, life goes on.

..//..